Acceptance..

THIS IS HOW IT IS.. NOT HOW IT

Was..
Might have been..
Should have been..

NOT HOW

I wanted it to be..
Hoped it would be..
Planned it would be..

I ACCEPT THAT THIS IS HOW IT IS.

Now I get on with my life..

-[auther unknown]

When our our life experiences are not matching with our ‘shoulds’..
When situations are plain unfair, but there is nothing we can do to change them...
When the perfectly rational decision is to let it go..

Blogging and me..

Alexis is one of the real gems I found in the blogworld and I feel that it is apt that it is he who tagged me to write about my blogging..

so here I go..

1. Are you happy/satisfied with your blog, with its content and look? Does your family know about your blog?

Yes I am quite satisfied. However I would love to add more pictures preferably taken by me.
Yes my family knows about my blog. Hubby dear and my boys seem to have a love - hate relation ship with it.
:))

2. Do you feel embarrassed to let your friends know about your blog or you just consider it as a private thing?

Only a very few close friends know about it. And I prefer it that way. For obvious reasons

3. Did blogs cause positive changes in your thoughts?

Sure. It has opened a lovely word where smart, intelligent and caring people voice their inner most thoughts and share their emotions and experiences.. Definitely this wonderful world has made positive changes in my thoughts. Positive changes in ‘me’.


4. Do you only open the blogs of those who comment on your blog or you love to go and discover more by yourself?

There are some blogs I love to visit regularly.. They keep my blogging going. I also try to visit those who comment on my blog as well as go blog hopping too. Depends on the free time I get. Which is really very little..


5.What does visitors counter mean to you?Do you care about putting it in your blog?

Yes I have put visitor's counter in my blog.. It is interesting to go through the reports and analyze them.. It sort of motivates me..


6. Did you try to imagine your fellow bloggers and give them real pictures?

Yes. That’s part of the fun of blogging.. you get to know people from their words, their emotions, and their comments.. It sort of builds up and as time passes and slowly you have an image of the person..
In the real world it is the other way round isnt it..?
I don’t know why, but creating an image for each blogger like putting a jigsaw puzzle together , gives me a thrill.. Also I believe that this image will be a true one



7. Admit. Do you think there is a real benefit for blogging?

Yes there is a real benefit
It has offered me connection and bonding with some special people , widened my horizons and has given me the pleasure of being the part of a warm wonderful community..


8. Do you think that bloggers society is isolated from real world or interacts with events?

Never..!! It reflects the inner world of the people living in the ‘real ‘ outer world.. and I have always believed that the inner world is the true world..

9. Does criticism annoy you or do you feel it’s a normal thing?

Criticism both positive and negative is normal and expected.. positive criticism encourages me.. I feel that there should be more frank positive criticism..
Negative criticism.. Well..it disturbs me .. For a few days.. Though I try to ignore it..


10. Do you fear some political blogs and avoid them?

I don’t fear or avoid them.. I am not much interested in them too..



11. Did you get shocked by the arrest of some bloggers?

No. It is to be expected I suppose..


12. Did you think about what will happen to your blog after you die?

Hmm.. I have thought about it.. It will die with me ..

But I expect hubby dear to put up a notice in my blog that I am no more so that my dear buddies are at least kept informed about it..
:(

13. What do you like to hear? What’s the song you might like to put a link to in your blog?

I love melodies..soft sweet ones..

This blog is an expression of the goodness I would like to cultivate within me and share with others..
I read this poem by Wordsworth as a fourteen year old and was instantly hooked .. This is my ideal woman. This I what I would love to be.. And I would love to put this poem a link to this blog


She Was a Phantom of Delight

She was a phantom of delight
When first she gleamed upon my sight;
A lovely Apparition, sent
To be a moment's ornament;
Her eyes as stars of Twilight fair;
Like Twilight's, too, her dusky hair;
But all things else about her drawn
From May-time and the cheerful Dawn;
A dancing Shape, an Image gay,
To haunt, to startle, and way-lay.

I saw her upon a nearer view,
A Spirit, yet a Woman too!
Her household motions light and free,
And steps of virgin liberty;
A countenance in which did meet
Sweet records, promises as sweet;
A Creature not too bright or good
For human nature's daily food;
For transient sorrows, simple wiles,
Praise, blame, love, kisses, tears and smiles.

And now I see with eye serene
The very pulse of the machine;
A Being breathing thoughtful breath,
A Traveler between life and death;
The reason firm, the temperate will,
Endurance, foresight, strength, and skill;
A perfect Woman, nobly planned,
To warm, to comfort, and command;
And yet a Spirit still, and bright,
With something of angelic light.


Thank you alexis.. Doing this tag was a beautiful experience.. cos I was writing about something that i hold dear to my heart..


PS. That is the pix of the blooming 'arali' in my garden.. thats how blogging has brightened my life..

Good News..!!

It is good news my dear sweethearts..I clarified it from the police myself..
:))
The boy was handed over to his parents.. The goondas were kept under police custody for a few days and released..
It seems the boys family had to payback some loan.. The police has told them to pay it back as early as possible..
So..
Three cheers to our cops..!!
And three cheers and hugs to our dasappen who did score..!!
:))

Desperate Hero..

The young man ran past the gates of our hospital, across the drive way and into the foyer. He looked around in panic and bolted into the X Ray unit.
His clothes were dusty. sweat and tears ran down the gaunt face. His teeth chattered. He smelled of filth, hunger and fear.

“Call the police..!!”

“They will kill me..!!”
He gasped, skulking towards the shadows of the dark room

The x-ray technician froze. He watched the boy as if in a trance.
"Call the police..!! Don’t allow them to take me away..!! "

He pleaded, his sunken eyes looking around wildly for a place to hide.


“They starved me for two days….”
“Please someone call the police….!!”
He pleaded at the small group of patients and staff who had gathered around..

The crowd watched in alarm and panic as four or five men rushed inside the room..

“Goondas..!!”

Realization dawned as they watched the brash tee shirts clinging to sweating, lean bodies.. Arrogant flashing eyes and colored hair.

“Come”

One man caught hold of the boy and started to pull him..
“No.. no..” the boy fell down to his knees weeping..


I was on my way to the lab when I saw a big crowd in front of the x-ray unit.

“OMG..!”

Something was terribly wrong..

People had a stricken look.. They were whispering to one another..

I could hear wisps of conversations..

“Call the police..!”

“Must be trying to get loan money back..!”

“Call the police..!”

“We must lock the door..! A gruff voice was speaking feverishly.”.
That was when I noticed Dasappen shoving people apart.. Trying to close the door..

As the crowd parted I saw few mean men trying to pull a petrified looking boy who was shrieking something

My heart was beating fast..!!

“Yes..! We had to lock the door..!!”

Suddenly I felt a blunt hit on my back..

“Move.. move.. “A cold commanding voice ordered and I felt myself being shoved out of the way roughly..

He looked about seven feet tall ..had golden brown colored hair and wore a tomato red colored tee shirt.. he walked into the room..

My heart was galloping..!!

“No we shouldn’t allow it.. we had to call the police..!”

I ran to my office..and dialed 100..

I spoke rapidly..

“Ma’m we have already got the complaint.. Police is on the way.. The voice was crisp..”
I rushed back.. And watched the scene in horror..

Everything seemed to move in a slow motion..

A huge crowd had gathered.. The boy was pleading something as he was being pulled across the foyer.. Few people had joined in the fight and was pulling the boy back.. Some were talking excitedly into their cell phones..Dasappen was in the center. Hugging the boy from the back.. His face was buried in the boys back.. His body was bent as he strained to pull the boy

Suddenly the golden brown haired leader took out a knife and flashed it in front of him..
There was a collective gasp. The crowd parted.. Many people moved back..

“Where was the bloody police..?”

I couldn’t bear it.. The boy was being pulled ahead slowly.. Surely

The procession had reached the porch and was progressing along the drive way..

I ran behind the crowd....

They were taking him towards a Qualiz parked near the gate..

I could see Dasappen still clinging to the boy.. Oblivious to every thing around him. his face buried in the boys back.. he clung.. Obsessively.. Compulsively..
“Dasappen..! I wanted to shout.. Let go.. They will hurt you..”

There was a collective gasp once more as a police jeep swerved in through the drive way.. My heart danced as I saw police men jumping out..

The inspector roared something..

The men froze.. Their body language changed.. There seemed to pass some unspoken communication..

I was surprised.. The men didn’t try to run away.. They just stood there.. Docile..
The inspector spoke something to the boy and the men.. Handcuffs were placed on all of them including the boy..

All of them walked towards the jeep like trained Labradors..

The Goondas seemed to have some unwritten code of conduct. All of us watched in spellbinding silence as the police jeep drove way followed by the Qualiz..

Pandemonium broke out..!!.. Everyone started speaking excitedly..!

“Must be loan money..!”

“The Goondas were talking about money..!”

“What if the police had not come..”

“Doc are you hurt..?” Someone asked..

“Nothing..!” I giggled.. “I will be proud to tell my boys about being hit by a goonda !” I laughed..

Must be “ Pacha vikraman.”. Gautam commented his mouth full of the chapathy and chicken he was gulping down,. as I told about the tall leader with golden hair..
.
Taj sat and stared at me. his huge eyes shone with excitement.. Peeps listened silently..

Imagine..! Goondas in Mama’s hospital..! Thank god Dasappen was not hurt..! I exclaimed..!

Dasappen..? The psychotic whose son died..? Peeps looked curious..

OMG..!

I had forgotten about Ravikutten.. his death.. No wonder Dasappen had clung so adamantly to the boy..

Next morning the first thing I did was call Dasappen to my room..

“It was only because of you that the boy was saved.. Somewhere his parents will be thanking you .”I smiled at him warmly..

“Yes the boy was saved only cos of me..” Dasappen spoke in his usual gruff over confident style..

I smiled again..

“Bala is worried that they will hurt me ..”

“Don’t worry .. they wont remember you specifically.. .”.I smiled .. “And they are under poliuce custody na..?”

“Hmmmm..”

Dasappen continued to stand there..

I wondered if I should say something about Ravikutten.. But I refrained myself..

I smiled again..

Dasappen.. Continued to stare at me.. strangely.

I felt uncomfortable.. The glitter in his eyes unnerved me..

Was it his psychosis..?

Or was it cos his eyes were moist..? Was he thinking about his Ravikutten..?

I wished he would leave..

Yes I was feeling uncomfortable..

My eyes too were becoming moist..

Dogmatism

Dasappen is a Gr 4 staff in my hospital..A psychotic on regular medicines..I have known him since the past 14yrs.

He is a constant headache for the matron.Cos of his tabs he can’t be put on night duty. He lectures to the supervisors about how things have to be done.. Taking x-rays.. Doing the lab tests.. Dressing the wounds.. Dasappen has a definite opinion

Everyone sniggers behind his back.. They make fun of his stocky barrel shaped hairy body.. The squinting glittering eyes.. His over enthusiasm in his work..

No body takes him seriously.. Cos every one knows that he is a psychotic on tabs..

No one dares to call him a psycho at his face..

“Lie down there you bitch.. Ill show you whether I am a psycho or not..” He once roared at a lady attendee who taunted him about his madness..

:))

But I had a fondness for him. I couldn’t help acknowledging his sincerity to his work.. His loyalty to our institution.. That he ploughed ahead despite the odds and provided good education to his kids..

One boy and one girl..

How are your kids ..? I would asks him casually..

Dasappen would puff out his barrel shaped chest .. The squinting eyes would glitter proudly.. His voice would become still gruffer with emotion..

I was away on a training when Dasappen's son’s body was found dead in Vellayani Lake..

The boy had gone for an interview.. And had just disappeared into the thin air.. The body was found three days later..

Accident.. Suicide.. Homicide.. Rumors spread..

But Dasappen had a definite opinion..

“It is homicide.. My son knew swimming.. He was murdered and thrown into the lake..”

I decided to wait for the post mortem report..

In case of drowning, the lungs are examined in detail…

Presence of planktons.. tiny microorganisms found in water.. are also looked for.. Their presence within the far off blood vessels and within the lung tissue indicates that the deceased was alive and breathing and his blood circulation was functioning when he fell into the water.. The plankton went in through the water that was inhaled in.. Crossed the blood vessels and were transported into the lung tissue.. and other parts of the body..

It wouldn’t be seen in far off blood vesels and tissues if the person was dead while he fell into the water..

However suicide can’t be ruled out by this test..

The post mortem report came.. Planktons were present in the lung tissue and
blood vessels

“Maybe he slipped and fell..” I told Dasappan gently..

“No ma’m.. He was murdered..” Dasapen was dogmatic. The eyes glittered as he stared at me..

Maybe he had reasons to believe it..( I knew that he had some problems with his sister’s husband.. There had been physical fights..) Maybe it was the belief of a father who believed that he knew his son well.. Maybe it was the part of persecutory delusion of a psychotic..


Dasappen refused to believe anything else..

It is seven years after his son’s death now..

Dasappen still works hard.. With enthusiasm.. And self-righteousness.

He didn’t fall into deep depression.. He didn’t have a nervous breakdown..

I wondered if the medicines he took helped to blunt his pain..

I hoped so..

And he still believes.. That Ravikutten.. Blood of his blood.. Soul of his soul.. Was murdered and thrown into the Vellayani lake..

( to be continued)


ps.I'v included some additional info about planktons/diatoms in drowning


*************************************************************************************

Drowning associated diatoms

Rajvinder Singh, Rajinder Singh, Mukesh Kumar Thakar
Department of Forensic Science, Punjabi University, Patiala-147002
Introduction

Drowning is type of asphyxial death by submersion in a fluid, whether or not the fluid is aspirated into the lungs. This is considered as the cause of death if the death occurs within 24 hours of the insult and if survival is beyond 24 hours after the submersion and implies that recovery has occurred after the insult it is called near drowning.

Diatoms are among the well known water planktons. Every water body has its own diatom diversity. Diatoms are autotrophic in nature and different genera are found in both marine and fresh habitats. Diatoms belong to class Bacillariophyceae and further divided into two orders i.e. Centrals and Pennales on the basis of their symmetry. There are about 10,000 species and 174 genera of diatoms having different shapes and sizes ranging from 1 to 500μm. Diatoms are commonly found in water bodies like ponds, lakes, canals and rivers etc. but their concentration can be low or high in a particular water body, depending upon the season. With regard to another feature-the water depth limits to benthic distribution-there is no incontrovertible evidence for autotrophic growth of diatoms below about 100 m.

When drowning takes place, diatoms enter into the lung cavity of a person through the aspirated water and this water exerts a pressure on lung cavity and rupturing of the lung alveoli takes place. Through these entrances diatoms can enter into heart, liver, kidney, brain and bone marrow. As diameter and thickness of lung alveoli remains between very small therefore it is not impossible for all the diatoms to penetrate into the body organs through the lung cavity and diatoms which can penetrate through this capillary network are called “Drowning Associated Diatoms” (DAD).

Analysis of diatoms present in the lungs, liver, spleen, blood and bone marrow has for many years been undertaken as a confirmatory test in possible downing cases. However, the diatom test has been controversial since numerous cases of false negative and false positive results have been documented. Careful analysis of diatoms is a useful means of determining whether or not death occurred while the face was submerged in water. Before diagnosis of death by drowning an emphasis must be made on the morphological and morphometric studies of diatoms from the putative drowning medium because penetration of a diatom in lung capillaries depends upon its size and density Hurlimann et al. (2000).

In forensic investigation, while solving cases related with drowning, one can easily detect diatoms in the viscera of drowned body, if drowning is ante-mortem and diatoms are present in that putative drowning medium. The diagnosis of drowning by diatom analysis should be considered positive when number of diatoms is above a minimal established limit; 20 diatoms/ 100 µl of pellet (obtained from 10 gm of lung samples) and 50 diatoms from other organs (Ludes et al.1996) and further matching of diatoms from bone marrow and drowning site can strengthen this supportive evidence and a positive conclusion can be drawn whether person was living or not when drowned. In the present study a detail survey of the literature has been undertaken and an attempt has been made to provide some important information about the specific types of diatoms, which are commonly recovered from the various body organs of drowned persons.

agony..

It was monsoon..

Dark angry clouds swarmed over the dull gray horizon.

The rain lashed down drenching the leaves.. soaking the ground…. puckering the surface of the lake with millions of ripples. Dipping the waterlillies..

The coconut palms swayed.. Their leaves surrendering to the cold, harsh wind and the incessant rain..

It was at about 11.am that the 'body' was found..

‘It’ lay among the reeds.. near the banks.. bloated.. skin soggy , blistered and broken in areas..

Dasappen shivered in the hostile biting wind , as molten heat rocked him in waves..

He couldn’t call ‘It’ Ravikutten..
His slim, smiling, earnest Ravikutten..

He couldn’t see ‘Its’ face..’It’ lay prone in the gray muddy water..

But the curly hair was familiar.. The striped polyester shirt and dark gray pants were familiar..

They had gone to the textile shop in the town to buy it two weeks back..

No the local tailor wouldn’t do. It had to be sharply stitched..

“Smart formal look is needed for the interview Acha.”

Ravikutten’s dark smooth cheeks had been flushed with excitement as he read the interview card. His dark eyes glowed earnestly..

Front office staff.. For a star hotel in Dubai..

‘Yes. Ravikutten will get the job.!.”

Bala had beamed at him as she lovingly pressed the shirt and pants once more.. Smoothing away imaginary creases.. The night before.

Ravikutten would be leaving for the interview.. In the first bus in the morning..

“Yes !”

Dasappen had nodded .. His heart almost bursting with pride..

‘They had made him a graduate hadn’t they..? And a diploma holder in hotel management and catering too..!’

The agent was asking for seventy-five thousand .. fifty now.. Twenty-five six months later. He would have to make final withdrawal from his PF.. But it would be worth it.. Ravikutten would look after them.. Ammu had to be married off.. But that could wait another two to three years.. she had just started her MA..

Yes Ravikutten would score..!!

His slim, , smart smiling earnest Ravikutten.. His first born.. His son.. Blood of his blood.. Soul of his soul..


The molten pain was rising high.. like crashing waves....Fiery.. Icycold..

Gripping.. Soaking.. Crushing and Blinding him..

Dasappen could hear himself howling.. Like an animal..

(to be continued)

The deep dread..

I glanced at my watch…

6.35pm.

“I should have remembered that it gets dark early in November. “I chided myself.

The lights of the traffic roaring ahead colored the raindrops blue, green and red… It had started to drizzle.

Peeps was away. My car was in the workshop. It had been a casual Saturday shopping with my boys aged 7 and 5... Not that I needed anything urgent.

Just an excuse to pamper ourselves. Wandering through the shops.. Cosmetics.. Clothes.. Black forest cake and Milkshake with Ice cream for the boys.

Gautam was raising his face to the sky in abandon.. His tongue catching the raindrops falling down.. His shoelace was undone. His tee shirt trailing down from his jeans..

Taj stood pulling my shawl.. he looked sleepy.. his jeans lay hung low on his hips.. the bottom trailing in the mud..

I tried to wave frantically at the auto rickshaws but they just whirred past ahead.. Fast..

I glanced at my watch..

6.50pm.

“Lets walk “. I pulled them along. Walking towards Palayam.. I was sure to get an auto there

The rain was gathering momentum. The trees in the university college campus looked sinister..The VJT hall looked threatening in the dark. I looked for the reassuring policeman often seen near the Spencer’s.. No he was not seen anywhere..

Ooh..! One auto was slowing down..

"Where to..?" His eyes measured the three of us huddled against the rain.. Without even an umbrella..

“”Kumarapuram.." I shouted raising my voice above the rain..


“No.” He shook his head snobbishly...The auto whirred ahead..

The sadistic pleasure in the ‘no’ was evident..

Rain plastered the hair to my skull. My clothes hung to my body dragging on my steps.. I drooped..

I could feel the eyes on me.. Young.. Old.. Measuring.. Weighing.. Teasing.. Curious.. Inquisitive..

Touching me..

“Oh yes..!” Another auto was slowing down..!

I clambered in pulling my boys along before the driver could open his mouth.. could speak..

“Where to..?”

“Kumarapuram”

Rs.90.

“Ok. “I sounded breathless..

I leaned back on the seat.. hugging my boys towards me... my eyes closed thankfully..

I could feel Gautam’s eyes on me..

I smiled at him reassuringly..

His eyes gazed at me..

“Why did you agree..?”

“It is late na..?”

“But it is too high..” He sounded indignant.

“It is dark na..?”

"But it is not fair.."

He looked disturbed..

“You are a coward.. You allowed yourself to be bullied.. Emotionally blackmailed.. "

His eyes accused me..

How can I explain it to him..?

I boss and admonish men in my work place.. I don’t suffer fools or bullies gladly during the day. I drive alone in the city even after 11.30pm cocooned in the safety of my car.

But in the night.... surrounded by staring eyes. If I am alone.. I feel strange..

My confidence falls.. A familiar deep unexplainable dread cloaks me.. I feel the eyes on me.. My voice become high pitched.. My breath quickens..

And those eyes stare at me.. Disturbing me.. Making me want to run to a safe haven..

Maybe it is my fault.. Maybe my response brings out the killer instincts in those around me..

Yes.. Maybe it is my fault.. Or maybe it is the fault of the men in my State.. Who look at me as if they have not seen a female of the species..

I have accepted it as part of being a woman.. Infact I have even included it in my profile..


Recently Parvathy ventured out alone at night. in my city.. To assess the problems faced by women who travel alone at night..

There were discussions about it in the newspapers and TV shows..

I felt happy to read it.. At least some women were trying to change it, not just accept it like me...

To be an angel...

I have seen it happen in many blogs.. Now it has happened in mine too..
Anonymous posting insulting comments..



"this one reveals the several faces of the self proclaimed angel Dr….. … …..(my name) In blog, you could fool others, not always in real life. Those who know you.......... knows the real …….(my name)"

Frankly …sincerely… I am unable to recognize the anon.

.
I have received a few anonymous letters in my professional life too.. Insulting and threatening ones..

I know how I should deal with them.. Throw it into the dustbin and forget about it.. I do the first thing but often the words haunt and disturb me.. For a few days..

I wonder who the anon is.. And why she /he hate me..

I am a person who lives by my own rules.. I do what I feel is right..

I can be very bitchy.. if i feel that the situation demands it..

I am not here to “fool” anyone about my virtues..

This blog is only an expression of the goodness I would like to cultivate and share with others..
I blog only for positive emotions.. Cos I feel that we all need positive emotions in our lives..

“Angel” “hope” and “love” were chosen with these thoughts in mind..

There may be lots of negativity in our lives but I don’t think anyone would be interested to read about it.. Anyone would benefit from it..

I don’t come here to fight.. Or insult..

I come to love and share beautiful emotions

I don’t know if my posts sound too self-righteous and goody goody… If I come across as a self proclaimed angel..

The previous post was actually a note to me.. I posted it cos I felt that it may inspire someone somewhere..

I have deleted the comment and enabled comment moderation..

Cos I don’t want any negative emotions in this space..

Please..

But I would like to clarify something..

No I am not an angel..

I am just an ordinary woman.. Ploughing ahead.. Pushing ahead..

But I would love to be an angel.. Even if it is only for one second..

It is my dream…

The Universe Within..

There is a silent universe slumbering within me…

My only truth.. My only reality..

I can plunge into its mesmerizing depth and vastness.

Slowly.. Surely.. In silence and solitude…

This world is all that matters to me.... My outer world is only a reflection of this inner world..

This world has to be soothed, nourished and lovingly nurtured..

This needs constant focus on my part..

Physical vibrancy ..Contentment… Gratitude… Forgiveness... Sharing… Order.. Simplicity.... Prayer... A sense of contribution.. The right thoughts.. A lovely self image.. Silence..Stillness ...Contemplation....Love and warmth..

All these enrich and fertilize this beautiful world..

Rush.. sickness.. anger.. hurt.. bitterness.. frustrations.. guilt.. and treachery and jealousy drains and shrivels it…

When my inner world is lush, vibrant and enriched I feel great.

Lovliness, Sweetness, Laughter, Joy , Confidence and Glow oozes out of me…

Caring.. soothing..nurturing..healing and inspiring the people around me..

My gifts are unleashed…

I become the rippling ocean.. The mountain mist.. A valley of flowers.. The molten sun.. The drenched mother earth..

I become a lovely elegant pearl..

I become an angel...

Rituals and Routine..

Rituals and routine didn’t impress me while I was young..Spontaenity… Variety..Adventure.. Different from the ordinary.... That used to be my mantra..

But now I feel different..Order… Doing a few things.. The..same way.. At the same time each day.. Sooths me..

Ringing the bell in my boy’s room .. lying on the bed.. as soon as I wake up every morning…. Daily morning walk, seeing the same scenery and the same smiling faces.. …Watching the NDTV news …all the four of us… chatting and joking as we have breakfast... Saying Rosary and a Psalm daily.. Laying down my steth.. cell… glasses and pen the same way, on my table before I start my work….. Having specific dishes on some specific days.. Lighting the candle before our family prayers at dusk.... Watching the night sky in solitude and silence every night..Pampering my body and face with bath and lotions before going to bed.. The familiar fragrance of camphor melting..as I slip off to sleep..

Simple pleasures of life.. But.. Ha..! So soothing.. So comforting.. I find all these things stabilizing me ..I find it binding and connecting our family in a beautiful manner....

No they are not just superficial things..

There is tremendous power and strength in rituals and routine...

PS. Thats my familiar scene every morning.. I walk along that road.. I start getting withdrawal symptoms if i miss it for a few days..!!
:))