Tuesday, January 25, 2011


I don't know why.. but there is at least one case of death during my night duty now a days..

Actually my colleagues have started to tease me about it..

Its not anything dramatic.. all are chronic cases.. waiting for the release that only death can provide.. from bedsores.. catheters.. and iv drips medicines and sleepless nights of agony..

Waited.. patiently..and  sometimes impatiently..by the patient. as well as the relatives...
Whatsoever.. I don't mind it.. I like to watch death arriving..


  I wait for the gasping to slow down.. the pulse to  become feeble.. and finally  the pupils to become dilated and fixed.

Waiting with the patient and his relatives I wonder how his life had been.. I say a silent prayer that the person leavng has no genuine regrets..

Recently I watched  an elderly lady breath her last.. the gasping was slowing down.. she thrust her tongue between her parched lips..

'Water ?'  I asked

She nodded softly..

A thin stream of tears trickled slowly down her sunken cheeks..

I told the sister on duty to call her husband

'Give her a sip of water.' I spoke gently..

He obliged.. she gulped the water down

Suddnly he started to weep and wheeze.. and crumpled on to the floor


We carried him to a nearby bed..

He was gasping..

Hyperventilating  actually..

 Cos of severe mental stress.. !!!!

 W left the dying patient and attended to him !!

He responded to treatment..

We waited for some time for him to  settle.. and went back to the dying patient..

And smoothed her death..

I remember another case.. a chronic alcoholic.. with end stage.alcoholic liver disease ..

He lay dying .. slowly..

What struck me was his son.. a Teenager.. only as old my son.. waited alone for the death to come.. only his few friends  were with him.

The man had fought with all his relatives and even his wife had left him

But the son has somehow been able to forgive him.. he waited.. for days.. on the veranda outside the ICU.. .
After the death.. the body was handed over to him.. he took over and made all the arrangements..

I was impressed by the way he did it.. soft.. sure and sad. and dignified... supported by his few friends as young as  him .
I felt like hugging him .. comforting him ..and supporting him.

But I did nothing..

Just watched and learned ...


Thursday, January 13, 2011

This year..


This  year I will take time daily to
Master my mind.
Care for my body.
Nourish my soul

I will Read , Write,  Pray and Thank daily.