You are the essence of essence.... Be sure of what you look for... It is you...It is in you..
Sunday, August 28, 2005
I was disturbed…Enormously...Kept tossing and turning the whole night.
“How could I tell him..? How would he react..?”
“Did he have a girl friend..?” I wondered... I wanted to meet his mom…
Getting emotionally involved with your patient is dangerous... I know I should be detached...
“Maybe I should ask someone else to talk to him.”.. But no… The situation demanded secrecy...
Absolute confidentiality... that’s what NACO advised.
I should be soft, gentle and nonjudgmental... I decided as I drove to the hospital... Detached... formal... compassionate...
He had been brought to the hospital one Sunday night following a Road Traffic Accident. A 27yr old engineer... lean handsome looks... light brown eyes and an adorable smile... Exactly the type of boy I wished my sons would grow up to be..
Nothing serious... few superficial bruises... and a lacerated wound scalp... I had sutured it.
But some of the clinical findings had made me order the test.
In the hospital I examined the wounds... they were healing perfectly...
The moment I had dreaded had come...
“Arjun, do you stay with your parents “I asked chattily...
“No doc, They are in US now... gone there for my sis’s delivery...” he smiled.
OMG..!! The boy would have to face it alone...!
I could feel sweat gathering on my brows... My gut burned.
“Arjun I have got something serious to tell u...” its really bad news...”
I wanted to get over with it fast...
He stiffened... He stared at me...
“You are HIV positive”
“Oops!! I had said it..”. I felt relieved...
The sexy brown eyes gazed into mine... he paled. He was silent for a moment... I wanted to hold his hands... But I couldn’t.. I felt uncomfortable..Something held me away..
Maybe its cos he seemed to withdraw... Maybe I was not competent enough..
He bent his eyes and stared at the floor... Then took a deep breath looked up at me . He spoke softly... The beautiful eyes were moist...
“I know...” he whispered.
( to be continued..)
Posted by hope and love at 8/28/2005 06:09:00 AM
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Poor guy...he was carrying this terrible burden all along..alone....heart wrenchingly sad. I dont envy you your job doc
thats sad indeed!! waiting to read more
He knew it already??
But at least he knew it already...
Some of the sweetest faces carry some of the most terrible secrets.
sad!. such incidents makes us feel sooo helpless, awaiting the next
god! my heart goes out to him. but why was he irresponsible in the first place? or did he contact it through some other ways than by not practising safe sex?
Touched my heart ....Waiting for more!!
"i know"!! thats great, he will lead a good life till his neighbour knows about it!
its a fight against the status-quo, a status-quo that made you refrain from holding his hands, that made him withdraw to himself!
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